Early Man - Closing In
1/5
By: Kevin Molloy
Your reviewer has the arduous task of trying to ensure that nobody ever buys this record - arduous, because the writing of it brings back painful, painful memories of those riffs. Monstrously awful, where perhaps they were going for awesomely monstrous. In any case, there's barely a track present that isn't a bad rehash of an already substandard Iron Maiden b-side. They're playing with Motorhead's deck of cards, but they're missing the 'Ace of Spades'.
All of this would have been excusable if 'Closing In' were pastiche, but unfortunately this duo (their bassist left them, for reasons unfathomable) have probably never found themselves to be more earnest. Some kids were destined to be 70s-rock-loving losers at high school, but the days in which they become rich, fat and bloated rock giants are, well, back in the 70s.
If it doesn't pain you too much, here are some track titles. 'War Eagle'. 'Thrill of the Kill'. 'Feeding Frenzy'. 'Like a Goddamn Rat'. Our personal favourite has to be, however, the sensitively worked 'Raped and Pillaged'. It can feel that way. In fact the whole experience has been rather akin to a hangover without the pleasure of drunkenness. Basically, just feeling ill, then.
Artists in this article: Early Man
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