Jamie T - Panic Prevention (Virgin)
3/5
By: Matt Tomiak
'F***ING CROISSANT!'
A slightly peculiar rallying cry to open an album, you might think. But its par for the course on 'Panic Prevention', the foul-mouthed debut album from the young Wimbledon native Jamie T. For that commencing remark heralds a somewhat half-baked record - the kind of thing that would be more suited to being passed around mates down Jamie T's local as a knockabout, unashamedly D.I.Y. CD-R rather than distributed to more discerning listeners nationwide.
Early reports suggested that Mr T was the 21st century urban street laureate most likely. But there's little in the way of in-depth social commentary here, rather, a series of rambling, X-rated script ideas for 'Eastenders', replete with a heavy streak of casual misanthropy. At times, Jamie T doesn't seem so much a songwriter as a government cataloguer of ASBO-incurring crimes.
Jamie T's singing voice is an undisguised cockney screech a la Billy Bragg, and there are parallels in the pairs' abrasive acoustic guitar (or as is often the case, bass) playing. Yet regrettably, Jamie T struggles to emulate any of the humanity and warmth with which The Bard of Barking has become synonymous. He'd also no doubt like to offer a kind of modern version of the scathing analysis of Paul Weller, but is so stubbornly literal in his character sketches that his tales have a skeletal, frustratingly unvarnished feel. 'Panic Prevention', its safe to assume, aims for the spot-on observational humour of Mike Skinner, but there's a problem: although we find observations aplenty, it's a shame it's never particularly funny.
There are bright spots: the bouncy-yet-bleak ode to teenage loutishness 'Sheila' for one; the undeniably infectious reggae-lite of 'So Lonely Was The Ballad' is another. But such tunefulness simply can't disguise the fact that Jamie T hasn't actually got that much to say -'Girls singing on the bus / Fellas kicking up a fuss' runs the refrain during the latter. No narrative, no characters, nothing there, in truth, to retain anyone's interest; it sounds a tad uncharitable, but one really can't help pondering upon hearing that lyric - 'Yeah? But so what?' Similarly, the central premise of the frisky calypso ramble 'If You've Got The Money' couldn't be thinner - Jamie opining in this instance, 'I think it would be funny / to take your girl / and spend a bit of your cash for me'. And that's about it.
If the aim of this record was to accurately record for posterity the suburban boredom and the tedium of the daily grind in early 2007 - then, well...mission accomplished. But that alone certainly does not a great listen make. The bare bones of a decent record are in place. The problem is, 'Panic Prevention' needs a whole lot more fleshing out.
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